Who’s the Boss of Me?
Uncommon Relationships: Experiencing the Seven Levels of Relationships – Part 9
When thinking about relationships, I had to dig deep. A relationship is whatever you relate to or are in relationship with. Generally we think of relationships having to do with interactions between people or something you can see, but there’s one relationship you have that goes beyond sight and even beyond ties you have with any of the other relationship levels. In this final installment I want to make you aware of the relationship you have that has and always will supersede all the others.
“God [Relationship Level 7] has blocked my way so I cannot move…” – Job
These as you know are the words of Job who lost everything. He’s lost so much that he finds himself referencing the highest relationship level. Job called his relationship level seven, God, but for this lesson let me reference this level as “The One on Your Throne.” Your throne simply means who’s your king or your true boss. Tamia and I like to say it this way. Who’s the boss of me? The reason why I’m not using the term God here is because most (51% and more) don’t have God on the throne like Job. While most (51% or better) would love for you to believe He is, it’s not so. However, they do have something that is influencing their lives; they do have someone on their throne. Everyone has a level seven relationship. So what do you need to know when your level seven relationship is off? “God [Relationship Level 7] has blocked my way so I cannot move…”
Relationship Level 7 – The One on Your Throne
I started not to make this a relationship level and then I rethought it. It’s this level that every person needs, in order to be successful at any of the other levels. Level seven represents who you have on the throne of your life. Because I’m a person of faith, I’d like to say this is God, but in most cases it’s not. It’s what’s calling the shots in your life. In some cases this is a person we’ve allowed to be in a place no person should ever be in. It’s the final decision maker when none of the other relationship levels have any answers. It’s the relationship level that influences changes in the other relationship levels. It’s the glue that holds you in a relationship at any of the other levels.
The Thought or Concept:
“God has put each part [relationship level] just where he wants it. How strange a body would be if it had only one part!” – bible.com/bible/116/1CO.12.14-19.NLT
All the other relationships you have, have been put in place by God, who should be the One on the Throne of your life. In this lesson, I want to provide you with insight to some of the things that we can find at relationship level seven that’s not God, but is calling the shots in one’s life.
Me and My Father [Relationship Level 7] are One
But before I get to those points. Let me explain the importance of relationship level seven.
“The Father [Relationship Level 7] and I are one.” – bible.com/bible/116/JHN.10.30.NLT
In the words of Jesus, Himself, He reveals that there is nothing that can separate you from your relationship level seven.
“Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD [relationship level 7] will hold me close.” – bible.com/bible/116/PSA.27.10.NLT
Even when your relationship level zero (a.k.a your family), the relationship you have no choice in the matter, turns away from you, your relationship level seven (a.k.a. The One on Your Throne) remains. When you don’t understand that relationship level seven is a level and the importance of such, then you’re open to abuse when this type of relationship is misplaced or misaligned. Let’s discuss how one can misplace this relationship level.
Now let’s get into the make up of a relationship level seven. I like to think of relationship level seven as the “noun” of your life. A noun as you learned in school is a person, place, thing, or idea. There is a noun in your life that calls the shots. I know you’re wondering then, where does God fit in and I will get to that in a bit. Let me reveal how and why a noun represents the One who sits on the throne of your life and help you see the problem with misplacing this relationship level.
I remember the biggest mistake I ever made in life was having a person, a man, a pastor on the throne of my life. I had so much esteem for this one person that I’d allow his words to trump God. It’s the person you esteem the most, whose words matter most. This is that person who can tell you what to do and you respect them so greatly you do it whether you agree, disagree, want to, or hate to, but you do. For some it’s momma, grandma, dad, or some teacher. But what happens when this person is no longer available to you? I would dare to say that you’ll no longer have the most important relationship level. You’ll have a vacancy, a void. Could it be that you’ve placed a person in a relationship that’s only fit for God?
Many have places in their life that call the shot. That place is called your place of work. I know people who move around the country because the job said so without considering what God says. Maybe it’s your church. Your school or even some organization? This place can become that person’s relationship level seven, not God. But what happens when this place is taken from you or removed out of your life? There’s a void, a vacancy in relationship level seven.
This one is a tough one for me to imagine because there aren’t many things that I’m so attached to that takes the place of God. However, for some, this could be sports, like NBA basketball, NFL football, or even college football. I know, at least where I’m from, Alabama Football is a god to a lot of people. They will do whatever it is to base their lives around this team and the sport. For others who are athletes it might be their gifted sport. However, when this thing takes the place of God; it becomes your relationship level seven. But what happens when you no longer have the thing, the sport or are unable to play any longer? You know what? There is a void and a vacancy that now exists.
If you’ll recall I mentioned I’d share where God fits in. It’s here. God’s not tangible or physical; He’s spirit. God falls into the category of idea. Notice I didn’t mention a specific religion or church affiliation and that’s intentional. That allows me to include them all as it relates to what makes up a person’s relationship level seven. No matter what faith, God’s an idea and it’s this idea that sits on the throne of many lives. Notice that Job never mentioned God’s denomination, he simply said God. When you hold an idea other than God in the place of God, it becomes your level seven. It’s like those who make the universe their relationship level seven. What you’re saying is, you’ve decided to hold this idea above God and have that idea sit on your throne and call your shots. What happens when you have the wrong idea calling your shots and it doesn’t work? You have a void and a vacancy that can not be filled.
I’d venture to say that as you read each of these groupings, you probably said (as I did) what if I’ve allowed more than one of these groupings to call the shots in my life. That would make you normal and it also says you have a misplaced relationship level seven. Fortunately, you’ve taken the time to read this and now you can make the necessary adjustments in the most important relationship level there is.
Today is Friday!
Regardless of what you wish others to think of you, we all have a relationship level seven, a person, place, thing, or idea that calls the shots in our life. The question is are you okay with who or what’s calling your shots. Probably not because that’s normal. Maybe it’s time for a change and now you know where the change must occur, relationship level seven.
Question: What person, place, thing, or idea is calling the shots in your life?
This concludes the “Uncommon Relationships: Experiencing the Seven Levels of Relationships.” Let’s quickly review each of the seven levels:
- Relationship Level Zero – Your family which is the only level out of your control.
- Relationship Level One – Your neighbors which are those who get neglected as a relationship.
- Relationship Level Two – Your disciples which are those who look upon you as their instructor.
- Relationship Level Three – Your friends which are the most misunderstood and abused relationship level.
- Relationship Level Four – Your inner-circle which are the few you allow to get in close.
- Relationship Level Five – Your closest friend which is the person who has no issues with you being you.
- Relationship Level Six – Your equal partner (a.k.a. your spouse) which is the level reserved for the most set apart from any other relationship level that you’ll do life with.
- Relationship Level Seven – The One who is on your throne which is the relationship you have with your deity even when you allow non-deity in this place.
We hope this series has allowed you to redefine your relationship levels so that you can experience the best life possible. And never forget that each relationship level is a crucial part of your life which is your business. Until next Friday, take a second and share this content with everyone who falls into one of your relationship levels. Thank you.