Finding Yourself in a Place of Unwanted Changes
Doing Battle When It’s Absolutely Necessary – Part 3
What if the dynamics of your life have changed and you need to face it. Let me say it a different way, when your world shifts, all that means is it has changed. The only time this is a problem is when you don’t change with it. Let me describe that briefly.
If a part of your life changes (childbirth, death of loved one, new home, etc.), your education, or your personal life changes and you don’t adjust, that leaves one with stress, anxiety, and disappointment.
If your work, career, or your business changes for the better and you don’t adjust, calamity is around the corner.
If you go from being spiritual to not being spiritual (allow me to be plain for a second), stop going to church and see how your world begins to darken around you.
If you stop interacting with people you’ve always done life with, what you’ll find is the relationships begin to deteriorate.
If you begin to stop showing love to someone you’re in relationship with, watch how that person begins to gravitate to someone who does.
All that so that you don’t miss my point. Change can not occur until you change. Scenarios like these are waiting on you to change.
As we mentioned in the previous installment, having the right people in your life helps you to get through the inevitable situations and conclusions of life. There are times when you have to face or have faced the things you’ve been avoiding. When change occurs, you must change otherwise you won’t change while everyone and everything else is changing.
The Good Book says it to this effect. Yea [even when] I must walk through a changed environment [valley of the shadow of death], I will keep moving as there is nothing to fear.1 The key here is to keep moving, stay in motion, keep walking. Normal is the person who stops moving in the presence of changes.
As I mentioned earlier, I declared war to regain my rights to be an active dad in the life of our daughter who then was too young to know any better nor remember any of it. But I’d like to give you two points about war or in other words, when you have to take actions on something you dread or would like to avoid by all means.
Number one: Your battle might end as soon as you conclude you’re in the war.
Pamela and I learned a valuable lesson that when others are fighting against you, the battle just might continue as long as you don’t fight back. As soon as I concluded that I was in a battle and made up in my mind that I had to fight, then and only then did the battle end. You see procrastination keeps situations, circumstances, and the stuff that’s changing, unnecessary stress, and worries in your life longer than it would if you hit it head on. Your war isn’t going anywhere if you are not doing battle with the things that need battling.
Number two: You want peace but don’t realize it’s on the other side of war.
The purpose of most battles is to get to a place of peace or back to peace. If this is true and it is, then peace is on the other side of a battle. Therefore you must come to grips that the undesirable act of war is necessary. You must go through a battle to get to the place of peace you desire. Your battle might be a physical fight, it might be mental or emotional, it might be an added disciple or even the removal of something that’s standing in the way. At any rate, it takes a fight that only you can fight to have the peace that only you can have.
In concluding with the understanding that one must accept they are in a battle and that the battle is necessary for peace, we can not forget the objective. This is about the children. In a family, specifically a blended family, you’re fighting for the children to have a life that’s unlike anyone else in a good way. The normal statistics say that a blended family impacts children in negative ways when compared to those in traditional families. Therefore since our life is our business, then it’s our business to make the changes necessary to combat such statistics. How can you make a blended family operate and produce better results than a traditional family?
Today Is Friday!
Pamela and I decided that if we focused totally on the children and not our pride, ego, and any selfish motives then we will win the battle of making our blended family work.
Questions: what battle, fight, or obstacle are you avoiding that’s delaying peace in the family?
Reference #1: Psalms 23:4 KJV, Bible.com, accessed December 15, 2020,
https://www.bible.com/bible/1/PSA.23.4.KJV
All Scripture references used by permission, see our Scripture copyrights.
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