Fighting the Wrong Enemy – Part 3
I’ll go ahead and give you my reveal right out of the gate. There’s one word that sums up this principle of being the same, yesterday, today, and forever. That word is “consistent.” You must learn to be consistent. If you didn’t know this, discipline is a Godly characteristic, therefore it’s an uncommon characteristic. You become godly, simply by being consistent. Imagine that. A person who is disciplined or consistent is one who’s tapped into a God-like quality which has the ability to produce God-like results in one’s life. It’s a major characteristic that Jesus exemplified. It’s said that He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.[1]
The average person is undisciplined when it comes to life, work, religion, interacting in society, and in their relationships. That means today, they didn’t respond like yesterday and tomorrow they won’t respond like yesterday or the previous day. The person who shows discipline in these areas is uncommon. Most successful parents will tell you that being consistent in the raising of children is extremely necessary. That’s the epitome of character. When someone speaks of you do they think of you as being the same person yesterday that you are today? And do they see your best characteristics carrying over into your future?
I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day. – James Joyce[2]
Your Disciplines are Leading You Somewhere
What consistency produces for a person is a relationship that pairs one’s future with yesterday and one’s yesterday to a previous day. In fact, everyone is disciplined or honors this law, the question is, how are you using it? Are your disciplines designed to improve your life or are your disciplines leading to your demise? Regardless, your disciplines are leading you somewhere, but where? I want to make sure they are leading you to a place you desire to go.
Let’s discuss four ways you can use the discipline of consistency to advance your family, specifically your blended family, in a direction you wish to go. This is what I call one of the right fights, you should engage in fighting.
- Fight to avoid being duplicitous.
The word duplicitous probably sounds like a word smart people use. In simple terms it means having two minds. When deciding on what we’re having for dinner, I often remark that Pamela is being duplicitous. She will commit to one restaurant and before we can get in the car, good, she changes her mind. One of the few times this occurs. That’s what it means to have two minds. Are you taking your family back and forth with how you live or the standards you set? When you’re duplicitous no one knows for sure what the answer, action, motive, or desire is. Are you leaving your family in a state of confusion? To eliminate this from happening, avoid being duplicitous. - Fight to set patterns worth repeating.
All behaviors are taught or caught. When I speak of patterns, we can equate these to habits. What habits have you formed? By the way, the average person forms habits that aren’t worth repeating. That’s a pattern. When your family watches you, are they picking up good habits or bad habits to use as a pattern for their lives? If you need a fight to fight, I suggest you fight to set patterns worth repeating. - Remove any unnecessary guesswork.
Put some systems in place. Did you know that by having discipline one eliminates the guesswork? For example, if you have discipline in your morning routine, your family won’t have to ask you what time we’re leaving for school. You see the routine takes the guesswork out of it. If you attend church service every Sunday, when Sunday comes no one will have to ask whether or not you’re going to church Sunday. It [your disciplines] takes the guesswork out. - Define who you are with your disciplines.
Help your family know who they are and who you are. There is but one way for someone to know who your family is and who you are and that’s through your disciplines. Most (51% or better) think that others get to know who they are by what they say. I often make this statement “believe none of what you hear and half of what you see.”[3] The truth is no one believes what you say until they see what you do. In fact, what a person or family does is what solidifies what they say or unravels what they say. It’s your consistent behavior that allows others to know who you are and who your family is. This also tells your family who they are or who they are not. Use your disciplines to make the statement about your family that you want remembered.
The one thing that speaks to your family, your children, and those around you, louder than anything else is your consistent behavior. This is what wins the battles in your relationships specifically for those in your blended family. You want to win with your children? Be consistent. You want to win with your spouse’s children? Be consistent. You want to win with your friends? Be consistent. You want to win with your neighbors? Be consistent. You want to win with your spouse? Be consistent. Be like God, the same today, yesterday, and forever.
Question: in what areas can you develop more of a consistent behavior?

Reference #1: Hebrews 13:8 NLT, Bible.com, accessed March 30, 2021, https://www.bible.com/bible/116/HEB.13.8.NLT
All Scripture references used by permission, see our Scripture copyrights.
Reference #2: James Joyce. BrainyQuote. Accessed March 31, 2021, https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/james_joyce_119807
Reference #3: Edgar Allan Poe. Goodreads. Accessed March 31, 2021, https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/252780-believe-nothing-you-hear-and-only-one-half-that-you